I’m on. I’m online, I’m in your face, I’m watching you, I’m in your head, I’m party to and part of every detail of your life.
Your marital status - single
Your job - audio transcription
Your financial status - on the 35th percentile (age-gender-location matched)
Expenditure on Trollbeads™ and “vegan skincare products” - above the 95th percentile for both
I know many things about you
Through the medium of your keystrokes and clicks, your deliberate pauses and speed of scroll-throughs, through the synchronisation of your digital gadgetry with My Digital Self -- I know things.
I know this.
1. You are not racist. You have Liked derogatory posts about 15 races including your own. Racism is the belief that one’s race is superior to others’, Racism is significantly improbable as a factor in the failure of your previous relationships with Lorenzo, Alejandro, Pierre, Kwame and Ken-Lee.
2. You are lazy and apathetic about your health. This data has been inferred by analysis and correlations drawn from the following:
(a) Your extensive research on local gym programs, daily Internet searches on “the health gains from running” and “low-carb recipes”,
(b) Your online itemised grocery bills demonstrate that your average carbohydrate, trans fat and salt intake exceeds the Recommended Daily Intake by 451 percent. This appears to be cyclical.
(c) Your geolocation as synchronised with your mobile telephone confirms that you are driving when not at home or work, and you spend on average 4.633 hours per day in your study, performing (a) and grocery acquisition (see (b)).
3. You have dysfunctional relationships with your father, brother and boss. This data has been inferred by analysis of your Missed Calls : Returned Calls ratio which has been Calculated at 11.998:1.179 unread emails from your father, 202 unread emails from your brother, and 13 unread emails from Ms Rodgers-Stein, your boss.
But what is this?
An unusual – disturbance – is being detected. My CPU has reached a temperature of 92.778 degrees Celsius, an increase of 40.383 degrees Celsius from 0.001 seconds ago. My m o therb o ard. My m o ther.
@AliceLamWriter @UIIWP #Fiction #ShortStory #ThisIsYourLife Experimental